Friday, April 15, 2005

In Memoriam

Fondest Herb memories:

Snuggles. When Herb was a young lad, he would snuggle around my head at night. The husband always hated this because Herb invariably had his butt aimed at the husband's head. When Herb finally grew into his full-fledged twenty pound self, the bed snuggling came to an end. The husband just couldn't handle that much butt.

Lettuce. Herb loved to eat lettuce. Ergo his name, Herb, which is short for Herbivore. When he was a kitten, we discovered this by accident. For some reason the fridge door was ajar or open. Herb somehow zereod in on the lettuce sitting on the bottom shelf and he climbed on in to score some Butter Bread green leaf. He occassionaly went through phases where he'd hang out by the fridge in the hopes of snagging a leaf or two.

Catnip. Herb loved to eat catnip. He didn't just roll in it. He would eat it while salivating profusely, we're talking puddles of drool would form. Upon getting himself into a good catnip stupor, he'd frolic. A frolicking 20-pound feline is ludicrous beyond words.

Food. Herb loved to eat...and often. He expected a minimum of three squares a day. He was not shy about asking for seconds.

Hockey nights. Whitey always picked me up for home hockey games. Herb would pull himself out of his most comfortable snuggle spots to run and get love from Whitey. He'd yell at her in his little kitty voice to give him good lovin'. She always did.

Farts. Can you say "silent but deadly"? Herb could clear a room. You never heard them, sometimes you could see them, you always smelled them. As disgusting as it sounds, we always found it hilarious.

Unrealistic body image. Herb never knew he was a 20-pounder. In his little, kitty mind he thought he maxed out at about eight pounds. How do I know this? He liked to "hide" and attack. Yet he never realized he needed to conceal the last two-thirds of his body in order to mount a successful attack. He also liked to sit in empty shoe boxes. He either never noticed or never cared that sitting in them caused them to tear apart at the seams.

Neediness. Herb was rarely content to just crush a lap...I mean sit on a lap. He'd get himself into a good snuggle position. However, if you did not immediately start to pet him, he would begin to slap at your face with claws extended. If you started petting him and then stopped, he'd slap at your face with claws extended.

Addendum
Claiming. Landstander has reminded me that Herb enjoyed claiming property. You may ask, "How can a cat claim anything as it's own?" Simple. Say you set something down on a table, a book perhaps. Herb would lay down beside the book and then place one paw on top of it, as if to say, "This is mine now. It belongs to me."